GWW Assignment #2: Personal Essay

For this assignment, one option is to pick a random object in your house that interests you. The exercise is to flex your writing voice, to feel it out. A second part of the assignment is to add a few interesting facts/ideas to your piece. Do five minutes of research online about something prominent in your essay, and blend the information in. Keep it to around 500 words.

Throughout my life, I've had a special fondness for piggy banks. What can I say? Dropping a coin into the slot on the back of a pudgy farm animal made saving up actually fun. I even enjoyed the story behind the object, which I read about on a box of Cheerios long ago: “pygg" was actually a type of clay used for making household objects such as jars. Thus, when people began storing money in these "pygg jars," the piggy bank prototype was born.

My most current piggy bank resides on a desk in my bedroom. Like a typical specimen of its kind, it’s plump and rosy-cheeked, complete with four legs, two ears, and a curly tail. It isn't pink, but a pure, porcelain white. (You might not realize it at first, but real-life pigs come in all kinds of colors-- brown, black, gray, spotted, speckled, etc.) The nose is small and delicate, and a coy smile can be found just below it. But most notably, the snowy swine is also covered in forest green four-leafed clovers on its face and body.

Yes, this piggy bank is Irish.

If you don't believe me, just pop in a penny and an entire verse of "When Irish Eyes Are Smiling" squeaks out in a high-pitched whistle. As a child, this provided endless hours of entertainment for me and my brothers (as well as a lot of ear-covering for my parents). This highly musical, pigment-challenged piggy bank sat on my grandmother's nightstand for as long as I can remember her being alive.

When our time spent with her became confined to the paleness and sterility of hospital rooms, the weeks slipped into months. After what we had all been dreading eventually happened, I remember being back in her apartment with my mother. The bedroom looked like it usually did: clothes hanging up, bed made, rosary beads draped around the mirror. The clover-covered piggy bank was still there, resting on her dresser. I didn’t dare put a coin in.

My mom suggested that I keep the pig, but my first thought was how could I? One look at it and I was ripped back to childhood, eating Entenman’s banana crunch cake on Nana's sofa and watching The Lion King on VHS. But I took it anyway, accepting the accompanying tears as well.

Seven years later, the piggy bank sits on my desk, its Irish eyes as wide as ever. When I press my fingers against its smooth, cold surface, a wave of tenderness inundates me— a feeling that’s sometimes sad, sometimes happy. And yet, the smoothness soothes me. The cold brings comfort.

How natural these material possessions seem to us— they become such regular, constant parts of our lives that we often neglect their true significance. If you were to shake my piggy bank, the soft jingling noise would clearly indicate that it isn’t loaded with cash. It is, however, packed to the brim bursting with images and sounds of memories of a past stage of life, and of a life that passed.

I didn’t see it then, but I know now that people need those tangible objects— something to hold on to— because people just don’t last forever.

Gotham Writers' Workshop Assignment #1: Memoir

Each week, I'll be posting my latest writing assignment from the Nonfiction 101 class I'm currently taking at the GWW in NYC.
Feel free to comment; I value any and all reader feedback.

Prompt: Make a short list of three big realizations you’ve had in your life. Pick one and write 500 words about the event or events that led to that realization. Stretch your memory, draw out the telling details, and keep in mind the natural arc of a narrative (beginning, middle, end).

Have at it, and good writing to you.

I was five years old when I met Gina in Miss Jones's kindergarten class. We used to sit next to each other at lunch, picking the crusts off of our turkey sandwiches together. Gina could never seem to stay in her seat in class. Each time she had to use the girls' room, throw out a raggedy tissue, or claim the best easel for Art Time, she had to pass my desk on the way. And every so often, Gina would sneak up behind me and plant a tiny kiss on my cheek, breaking out into a fit of giggles before darting away quickly. I would wince and rub it off, shrieking "eww" in front of my tablemates. Why, then, did I look forward to it every day? Gina's family moved at the end of that school year. I don't remember her last name.

* * *

As I entered middle school, pool parties were all the rage if you were lucky enough to have a summer birthday. Getting invited to one felt like winning the golden ticket to a land of inflatable pool toys, infinite piles of cheeseburgers, and do-or-die chickenfights in the pool. But my eyes were not drawn towards these things. I recall standing aside from the pack, observing the swimsuits of my female friends hugging their bodies' subtle curves, my head feeling lighter than the inflatable inner tube I'd just been clinging to minutes earlier. When it was time to head inside the house to change out of dripping wet pool gear, the group always preferred to change in the same tiny, crowded bedroom. But I dissented, grabbing my clothes as fast as I could to retreat to separate chambers in search of solitude. Just before my mad dash at Laura Rogers's 11th birthday party, she and another girl came right up to me and asked “What’s the big deal? We’re all girls here!” I turned and bolted to the bathroom, locking the door shut and blocking it with my body, even though no one had followed me.

* * *

Throughout high school, I often spent hours at the riverside park just one block away after my grueling day was finally finished. One warm spring afternoon, Rebecca and I were sitting on a green bench right by the water. As we watched the shimmering crystals that danced upon the waves of the Hudson, Rebecca silently moved from the upright position to horizontal. She gently lowered her head onto my lap, stretched her legs out along the bench (one crossed over the other), and closed her eyes. I breathed short, choppy breaths, and stole a glance at her illuminated figure before continuing my steadfast gaze upon at the river.

Perhaps it was then— when the still serenity of that moment washed over me— that I knew this was, and always would, be a part of me.

Writing About Writing

I've always found that writing about writing tends to fall into self-indulgence. Even as I just begin to compose this entry, a squawky little voice in my head is telling me: "don't try to sound like you know what you're talking about too much."

Such reservations most likely stem from my perpetual awareness of what an amateur I am. Why should anybody listen to what some 22-year-old-- just a kid, really, in the grand scheme of things-- has to say?

And yet, that very question is exactly what motivates me. What do I have to say? I'll prove it to you. If another human being can connect with or derive some kind of meaning from my written word, then I know I've succeeded... mostly. (I don't believe that anyone is ever 100%, fully, truly satisfied with what they've created. Even if you're 99.9% happy, there will always be that irking 0.1%, which leaves you with two choices: cast it aside, or let it eat at you. As much as I try to pick the former, the latter often wins out.)

So here I am. This is the period in my life where I'm aspiring, hoping, dreaming that I can one day turn an interest into a career. How does anyone even begin to do this?

There's only one way I know how: cultivate. It's like taking care of a plant: unless I nurture this passion, it won't grow and develop into something greater. Letting it die would be sad, but it would be even more pitiful. And just downright lazy. (I'm no botanist, but I'm pretty sure of this.)

Thus, with my college newspaper column gone (and a circulation of 5,000+), the first step was the very blog that you're looking at right now. These past few months, DTRS has been an adequate outlet for those sporadic bursts of inspiration that bubble up in my brain. When they threaten to spill over, that's when I take up the pen and paper (err, keyboard and monitor) and get to work. While I certainly don't write in it as much as I would like-- the daily 8:30-4:30 is more draining that I initially predicted-- I'm just glad that it didn't crash on the takeoff and fizzle quickly into a failed experiment. So far, so good.

The next step: I just began a six-week "Nonfiction 101" writing course with the Gotham Writers' Workshop in Midtown Manhattan. If you're a New Yorker, then you've probably seen their little yellow newspaper kiosks interspersed on street corners around the city at some point. After 3 months to the day (eep!) as a full-time working stiff, I've felt achingly inhibited both intellectually and creatively (the true nerd actually misses being in class-- that's me). So I signed up for a course with Gotham while I could still afford it (the student loan bills start rolling in next month-- I know nothing more terrifying at the moment).

The verdict is still out. I'm the youngest person in the class, and the only recent college graduate. The "students" include five lawyers or lawyers-in-training, two therapists, and several businesspersons. Oh, and our teacher is a published author who spent three years in a Korean prison when he wasn't much older than I am now. An intimidating environment? Pardon my language, but I almost shat myself.

And yet, it felt strangely familiar at the same time. All fourteen of us sat around a rectangular table facing one another. We did a series of writing exercises pertaining to memoir and shared some of them with the class. I forced myself to raise my hand and read, because I've done this before and can do it again. Spontaneous, in-class, timed freewriting-- an activity that many find natural and liberating-- is actually my Achilles heel. (I'm the nut who thinks too much and agonizes over each and every word. Ask my girlfriend; she's seen me at my worst.) All the more of a reason, then, that I should be working on it.

As jittery as I can be, I try to remind myself that if I had allowed fear to defeat me, then I honestly wouldn't have accomplished much of anything in my life. Coming out, giving Villanova a chance, and letting myself love and be happy-- none of these would have happened. I can't even fathom the thought of a universe in which I'm still trapped in my 17-year-old body. Repression and regret got me absolutely nowhere, and the same lesson can be applied to writing: as much as writing frustrates me to no end, I'm a thousand times more frustrated when I'm not writing.

Let that be my mantra. As much as life is so uncertain at this stage, at least I've found one thing I'm absolutely sure of.

Stranger in an Unstrange Land

In May 2009, I donned a cap and gown and sealed the deal on my Villanova University undergraduate education. Four months later, I still feel as though that moment didn't quite happen.

No, I'm not crazy. Of course it happened. (Who could forget the surprise speech from Coach Jay Wright?)

What I mean is that the moment is still fresh in my past-- in our past (hi there, Class of 2009). Fresh enough such that I don't exactly feel like a graduate just yet. True, I have a job (knock on wood), but not enough time has passed to make me any more of an "adult" because of it. Simply put, I am a recent college graduate.

Therefore, when I visit my beloved alma mater-- which I have already done several times since my official exit from undergrad life-- I still feel like a student. And I have more than a few younger friends who are still blissfully caught up in college, so why would I not pay them a visit when I can? Makes sense to me.

Well, it doesn't seem to make sense to some other people. What I've discovered in the midst of this post-Villanova abyss is that even recent college grads like myself are often viewed as outsiders, foreigners, even as invaders when we reappear on the Main Line.

Example: It's a Friday night and you're in town headed to Brownies, a Villanova senior's favorite place to spend happy hour. You fork over five bucks, grab your cup and enter the bar. You're about to dash over to the buffet line before it gets ungodly long when you quite literally bump into an old buddy from the Class of '10.

Almost instantly, these few words are emitted from this person's mouth:
"What are you doing here?"

Ah. Except they really come out sounding more like this--
"What are you doing here?!"
or "What are you doing here?!"

Wow, that was awkward. This phrase is usually coupled with arched eyebrows, and a look of complete and utter confusion.

I'm sorry, but I don't understand. In the span of just a few months, has my alumna status also labeled and subsequently denounced me as a "creeper?" Is it really so strange to come back to visit more frequently than once a semester? (i.e., Homecoming) And shouldn't us recent college grads cherish these visits to our alma maters while we can, while we still have friends who go there? (Honestly, after the Class of 2011 graduates from Villanova, I won't have much of a reason to be at Main Line bars unless it's for a reunion-type event).

I'm not going to have a random acquaintance or crappy Facebook friend make me feel like a weirdo when I'm back at my school. I won't allow it. Truthfully speaking, your real friends will be thrilled to see you again, and make you feel just as welcome as you should be.

After all, wasn't it just yesterday when we were playing beer pong on a Monday night and ordering from Domino's at 3 AM? Yeah, I thought so.

Bye Bye B Express: The Current "Q"-tastrophe on the Brighton Beach line

I have a bone to pick with the MTA. That statement probably doesn't shock you in the slightest. After all, what New Yorker hasn't had a complaint about the subway system? No, I don't mean foot-long rats scampering across across garbage-littered tracks. That's nothing.

I'm talking big: service disruptions, construction, track work. One might say these things are an inevitable part of any public transit system, and that their purpose is, ultimately, progress and improvement of that system for the good of the community. And I probably would have agreed with that.

That is, until September 2009 wreaked havoc on the Brighton Beach line in Brooklyn-- home to my beloved B express & Q local trains.

Actually, it's worth noting that the problems began long before September. For months, the Avenue U and Neck Road stations on the Q have been closed due to construction. In their place popped up the oddly-named B3k shuttle bus, which originates at Kings Highway Station, making stops along Avenue U between Ocean Avenue and Gerritsen Avenue. What's silly here: 1) The B3k doesn't actually stop at either of the blocked-off stations. Ocean Avenue is as close as the bus gets to the Avenue U station (located 4 blocks away on E.16th St), and it doesn't go anywhere near the Neck Road stop. Not quite as helpful to commuters as it should be. Additionally, the local businesses around the Avenue U station in particular are probably suffering.

Anyway, here's what happened next. At Kings Highway and several other express stop stations, signs were posted explaining that there would be no B express service in Brooklyn for a period of two weeks due to ongoing track work. Thus, the B would operate on the local track with the Q. I groaned out loud when I heard the news. The morning and evening rush hours would undoubtedly be delayed to some extent. An annoyance, but at least it was temporary, right?

Wrong. Soon after the original posters were put up, new ones stated that the B express service was now being terminated until (drumroll, please) Fall 2010. Upon taking in this revision, my jaw dropped and fell to the floor, in a manner not unlike a cartoon character.

While the thought of having to wait at least a year for the B to return is just awful, what angers me more is how the MTA sneakily chose to break the news to commuters-- by, well, withholding the truth from us. Did they think that initially telling us of a "two-week service disruption" would soften the blow of a two-YEAR disruption?

That's right-- in the middle of writing this post, I logged onto the official MTA website (www.mta.info) only to discover that this massive project has now been extended a year until Fall 2011. That information sure as hell isn't printed up on any posters yet (but it is on the web site, finally).

It's infuriating, and yet there's nothing much straphangers can do but write frenetic, useless letters to local officials. Oh, and bitch about it to one another (which will certainly occur more frequently with the arrival of colder weather, while waiting endlessly for a train to come with the wind nipping at your face).

And now, here is the icing on the cake: for the past two weekends, shuttle buses have replaced the suspended Q train service from the Kings Highway to Prospect Park stations, due to-- you guessed it-- more track work. Thankfully, there are both local and express shuttles (the express zips right to Prospect Park in one stop), as well as a much-appreciated connection to the 2 train at Flatbush Avenue. But God help you if you're the poor sucker stuck on a local shuttle-- a typically quick journey on the Q becomes a hellish crawl through the middle of Brooklyn. My guess is that this weekend shuttle bus mess is going to continue indefinitely as well, just like the B express cancellation. Of course, as usual, the MTA chooses not to tell us this until whenever they feel the time is convenient. Lovely.

Thus, three major problems-- the Avenue U/Neck Road station closings, the banishment of the B express, and the weekend Q shuttles-- are occurring simultaneously along the Brighton line. In all honesty, this kind of thing would never happen to commuters living in that fancier, more expensive borough across the sea. This is more than enough to expect us to put up with, especially considering the recent fare hike (I find myself now longing for the "two dollar days," a now-golden era in NYC transportation history preceding the financial crisis). Is our money really going towards progress, or are we simply getting ripped off? I suppose that the proof is in the product. All I can say is that the "new" stations, post-construction, better be flawless in every way. Or, more realistically, they can at least shine with the brightness and beauty of modernity that characterize much of the Manhattan underground. It's the only way that anyone can endure the next two years of commuter chaos and still stay sane.

So just how much more shit will be dumped on Q/B train users this year? Stay tuned, Brooklyn. We really have no choice but to, comme d'habitude, wait and see.


[*P.S. Forgot to comment on the impeccable timing of this mess. It just couldn't have happened while I was away at school-- no, of course it had to perfectly coincidence with my current post-grad situation, i,.e. living back home and commuting 5 days a week. Ah, life has funny ways of playing tricks on us, does it not?]